I Remember By Diana Kotyuha

I remember the day I first met you. I remember the first word you said to me. I remember it all, but I bet you don’t remember. I remember the conversation we once had about doughnuts. I even remember the first time you said I love you. But I also remember how we fell apart.

We had been together almost 5 months. It was the first day of school but it was also the day my heart died. I woke up feeling happy making sure to send you a good morning text and to remind you how much I love and care for you. Getting on the bus to find a seat was ok. I got to the school slowly feeling the dread of last year’s demons coming back.

Me getting called fat and ugly while wishing and hoping for someone to hold me to help me fight my demons with me. Getting picked on by people because of false rumors. Oh how I longed for someone to love and to give love back to me. I closed my eyes trying to erase the memories but they stayed in my head like an annoying song. I somehow found my classroom to get my schedule. My locker got jammed no one could get it opened so my stuff had to stay in the office.

I got to see my friends again, but also learning who the real friends were and who the fake ones were. I sit there telling my friends how great and loving you are. Little did I know that at your school you were having lunch with another girl sitting on your lap feeding you food and kissing you. I wasn’t even thinking about you ever cheating on me. At my school during lunch I had to sit there getting food thrown at me by stupid jerks.

When I heard the finally bell ring I ran out of the school I immediately start texting you. I tell you I love you but instead of an I love you too you texted me saying yea. I felt a pain but it went away when I thought maybe you had a rough day too and that you didn’t feel in the mood to talk. I called you but you ignored my call. Then I got a text from you. I started to smile but then I opened the text. My smile vanished.

As I kept on re-reading what you texted me not believing it. Tears that I tried holding back but I couldn’t as a rush of pain attacked my poor aching heart. As I read the words.

“I think its best if were just friends. I met someone new today and we did a few things I think it would just be best if we kept little contact as possible. I know how much you love me but as I was kissing the other girl my love for you left.”

I couldn’t take it anymore. The rejection, un-returned love, unfaithfulness, lies and heartbreak. I ran as fast as I could away from it all. I never stopped running. Till one day my heat couldn’t take it. I fell to the ground tears on my face a broken heart I was desperately trying to repair by myself. One thought on my mind ‘I forgive you.’ Now as I look down at everyone’s tear stained face. Their eyes full of different emotions. One pair of eyes stood out the most his. I watched as he walked up to my tombstone and read the words.

Diana Kotyuha
1997-2012
Died of a major heart problem, the most known problem. Only one question remains, why did you leave me?

Ann's Last Goodbye

This story happened around 2008...

After months of applying to various companies and still jobless. I decided to go back to school and took a quick computer course, and there I met Ann, (not her real name) she was really nice & friendly and we became the best of friends almost instantly, she was so fond of me, she said I reminded her of her boyfriend who was in another city taking up nursing, they didn't get to spend much time together because of their conflicting schedules, they were only able to see each other once a month. I've realized how much she loved his boyfriend because she is all she could think of and was always our topic of conversation.

Then one day, I woke up really early, I think it was around 4:30am and the very first thing that came to my mind was her. I didn't pay any attention to it and tried to go back to sleep but every time I closed my eyes I would see her face, I was like, this is weird! I was able to go back to sleep but woke up late, around 7:20, my Class was starting at 8am so I hurried up and took a quick shower and while in the shower I was seeing her face again! It started to bother me!

I was on my way to class when I saw her, I thought her face was blurry but I still could see her eyes for some reason... She passed me and kept going down the stairs without saying a word, I asked her where she was going and that we are already late but no reply.

I went to the classroom and it was unusually quite! Everybody was there except for her and the teacher so I went to my seat and waited, when the teacher came, she announced that Ann's was gone: (she was found by his dad hanging from the ceiling, in his room around 6:00AM.

All I could think was, am I dreaming? I just saw her! This couldn't be real!

That night, I went to the wake with some of our classmates, I found out from her sister that she hung herself because her boyfriend left her for another girl and that the boyfriend was seeing the girl for 10 months already before he decided to break it off with her.

I also found out that she actually passed away around 4:30AM, the very same time that I woke up that morning thinking of HER.

I know it's been more than 5 years but I am still thinking of her, still praying for her soul.